Bears are stronger then us, and the liberals are having us believe that they won't try and kill us. They will. The bears are also in aliance with the pluto haters, scientology lovers, Anderson Cooper watchers, Bush bashers, Nancy Pelosi followers, tree huggers, chinese communist (and all other communists), Bill Clinton kneelers (no pun intended), devil worshipers, tree huggers, baby killers, French cadian humanists, Barbra Streisand listeners, vegetarian PETA socialists, terrorist lovers, Hugo Chaves obeyers, and hollywood leftists from Hell. Bears must be stopped before they can get a nuclear weapon.
I support this petition because I believe every little spout of truthiness that sprouts from Stephen Colbert's lips. I then water this sprout intill it turns into a real-life replica of Stephen Colbert. I have my bear rifle ready, and will defend my house and city (Green Bay) From the hated bears, to the death. Soon, they will march on our beloved stadium, but we will Pack them away!
You are my hero! I was chased by a bear in Yosemite and it has scarred me for life! No one else understands my position on these horrid creatures - until you...Bears ARE the evil creatures you expose them to be.
because bears are part of the outdoors and the outdoors must be destroyed. So should kittens. I do my part by eating kittens sauteed in the blood of virgins. It's a well known fact that kittens run through fields before God strikes them down as a product of YOU masturbating. Plus, virgins congregate in woodland spaces, often wearing flowers in their hair. Why? To attract bears and mate with them. Thank you for your time, I will bring this to the president's attention.
Bears are mean SOB'tches
Especially Grizzlies. they can litterally eat your skull and the contents thereof. Even after you shoot them with your 2nd ammendment rights, they can still eat your head in a passionate, hedonistic orgy of head eating.
Then there is those yin yang communist Pandas too. The fact that most of them live in zoos on the government dole should tell you something.
because a bear assassinated President Abraham Licoln due to the President's pro-Log Cabin agenda preceding his presidency. When the bears were displaced by the logging companies, they elected John Wilkes Bear (often incorrectly written as "John Wilkes Boothe" by bleeding-heart liberal, pansy, pro-queer grizzlies) to kill "Our Nation's Greatest Hero of the 19th Century." (Author's Note: Stephen Colbert is currently in the running for "Our Nation's Greatest Hero of the 21st Century." Vote for him at www.colbertisthegreatestf uckingherointheunitedstat esoffuckingamericabitches .org). Bears are also why I hate Latin.
I once was walking through the mountains of New Mexico when I came upon an apple tree fully of delicious apples. When I went to grab one, there was a bear in the tree. I did not get an apple that day, the bear would not let me near the tree . I fear this is only the beginning. Kill the bears or you may not ever get an apple again!
The bear is the offial animal of several states and countries such as california, louisiana, montana, new mexico, west virgina, and Russia. Clearly these governments all share a common trait, they are all COMMIES and thats just not the American way.
Bears have been secretly plotting against humanity for years, waiting for the perfect time to strike, and the liberal agenda here in this country refuses to allow us to defend ourselves from this threat before they strike! Don't show mercy to bears, they will only show you their claws in return.
we've been nothing but complacent slaves to the bears propaganda for far too long. I support this petition because we have a right to walk through the woods at night without the fear of being robbed of our dignity because we are of a different species. I support this petition, gentlemen, because it is time we take action! It is incorrect to classify the revolt of humans as simply a conflict of species - of man against bear.... Rather, today we are seeing a global rebellionof the oppressed against the oppressor, of the exploited against the exploiter...
bears must be stopped. while grizzlies and black bears are an obvious threat, koalas are the most evil and dangerous of their kind. Sure, they lure you in with their, "I'm so cute! I'm eating a eucalyptus branch!" Then they sink their godless fangs into your jugular.
YOU GUYS ARE ALL SO MEAN!! how would you like it if you were a bear and people wanted to kill you?!god woldnt make bears if they werent supposed to be here!!I AM TOTALLY AGAINST THIS PETITION!!
I do not support this petition. Not all bears are killing machines. Stay out of their territory and you wont be lunch. Tammed bears are nice, and gentle, and if you look in their eyes... you can see that they do have feelings to.
I hate Bear!!! I will personal kill one bear for every bear there in existence (effectivly eliminateing the bear threat)but I need your help. Join my (and Colbert's) crusade to end the bear menace!
because bears killed my father. It was a sunny afternoon, my father often liked smelling flowers on the outskirts of our small farm. The wind was calm. He thought he was alone, when suddenly, BAM, he was hit by a mini-van. He was in the hospital for 2 weeks. Then a bear ate him. They must be stopped!
because Bears fart in the woods, and everyone knows that Bear farts contribute to Global Warming. Also Tipper doesn't like the fact that Bears are bare. Running around in the woods with their dingles hanging out. I mean how gross is that? And global warming will kill us all!!!!!!
im sick of bryan the bear eating my food and attacking me when i least expect it!! lets kill that stupid bear!!! yeah!!! whose with me!!! come on!!!...yeah...lets go...follow me...(runs away)
Bears need to go!! Im sick of Brian the Bear attacking me at school all the time and eating my food!!!
Kill that stupid bear and eat him!!! YEAH!! WHOS WITH ME!!!...yeah...yeah....wo oh...(runs away)
teddy bears have always creeped me out. Insane little smiles and the constant glassy-eyed staring. And California, the most soulless state and known bearerist sympathizers, has a bear on their state flag. That tells you everything you need to know.
