For failing at any semblance of having a life, and creating textbooks such as Calculus: Graphical, Numerical, Algebraic, and especially such terrible lines regarding the Fundamental Theorem, the authors need a serious butt kicking. We propose to give each AB and BC calculus student from DSHS a chance to express their discontent at the losership of these authors by rapidly striking the posterior regions of the authors with an apendage, preferably a leg.

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