I believe I have a solution. We could make it a requirement for everyone to take a mandatory IQ test and anyone who doesn’t score over one-hundred points must be

Wait, there are people who think rap doesn't suck? We need to do something about this epidemic immediately before it gets serious! As of now all black people are banned from the radio!!!!

Lets put an end to the religious superstition. The whole notion of an evil alien lord brainwashing the souls of every human on this earth seemed funny until I realized that people actually believed it. Is there anything people won't believe? Anyway I support this petition. These superstitious wackos don't deserve tax exemption.

Organized religions suppress critical thinking and breed both hatred and ignorance. I support this petition, and may (insert god or goddess here) not bless because he/she/it does not exist.

The only thing in this petition I agree with is the proclamation that the first ammendment of our constitution has not been enforced properly, particularly the part that says