I support this petition. I will passionately avoid doing business with your advertisers until Red Eye is made available to my fellow conservatives across this tiny globe. Red Eye is the only conservative oriented humor in the world. I\'m too internet-cool to type \'in the world\' in all capitals. But kindly indulge me and imagine me saying that \'in the world\' bit very, very loud. Come on. Seriously. This is mean. Give it back to them.

I support this petition strongly.